Over the past 7 months I’ve had a lot and I mean a LOT of people come up and out of the blue solicit the most bizarre advice then question or scold me on my decisions. The reality is, do what’s best for YOU and YOUR family.
My attitude on most of this advice has been “Hey, if that worked for you…cool. But that’s not for me!” I learned that from one of my dear friends when I told her I wanted to do cloth diapering in addition to disposables. She told me to go for it, but that was not her thing and she takes great joy in slam dunking that stinky disposable into the diaper genie.
Over the past few months I’ve heard it all. Organic baby food vs homemade vs store bought jars. Comfort or cry it out. Daycare vs. stay at home Mom. And the debate goes on and on…. For the record, homemade, comfort and daycare 🙂
The biggest debate I’ve run into is a bit personal, how the child going to be fed (breastfeeding/formula) and birth (c-section, natural, medicated etc)
The usual questions I get are ‘When are you due? Boy or girl?’. Pretty tame stuff. Recently I had a near heated debate on how I’d like to deliver and how she will be fed. It baffled me how completely opinionated people can be based solely on their experience, something they read somewhere or saw on TV. I’ve gotten odd looks (in addition to cheers) when I tell people bottle feeding may be the way I go (but not formula) because she’ll be going to daycare and that just makes sense. And as far the birthing process goes…that’s a bit personal. I’m all for the natural process but if and epidural is needed or a c-section is warranted…I’ll do it.
So far the responses have been
‘Bottle feeding?! Why? She’ll get confused…don’t you dare use formula, that’s terrible’
‘Baby X had formula, It’s easier…you should do that’
‘Daycare? Why? Just quit your job’
‘You’re going to be a working Mom…that’s…nice…’
‘Oh, don’t put her in THAT daycare…I heard from a friend of a friend of a girl who used to work there….’
‘You won’t be able to handle the pain…just get the epidural and stop fighting it. You’ll never feel it’
‘I had an epidural and now I have back pain, don’t do it.’
‘You want a natural birth..and laboring in a tub? That’s weird! Why don’t you go have your baby in a river’
What it boils down to for ANY Mom is be the best Mom YOU want to be. So what if you want to feed your kid organic food, teach them 5 languages and wear cloth diapers. That’s fine. But it’s also fine to get a cartload of Gerber jars from the grocery store, feed them formula, teach them baby sign language and invest in a boatload of Pampers.
It’s your child. And you’ll be the best Mom for that child. Only you can make those small decisions that work best for you and your family. Did Einstein wear cloth diapers? Did he have formula in a bottle? Did he go to a daycare? Who knows. But I bet his Mom was pretty awesome.
Go out there and be the BEST Mom. You probably already are!