A few weeks ago I had the longest…ultrasound…EVER. They go over everything just to make sure mom and baby are ok. I get it. But the funniest moment was when the ultrasound tech was going through her ‘check list’ of all the things she need to see in find on this bizarre black and white scavenger hunt. Out of the blue, she states ‘whoa! ok…well there’s her foot!’.
My child…like Stuart from MadTv stretching his leg out saying ‘nooooo….say it into the microphone’…just randomly thrusts her foot out for everyone in that tiny exam room. Cute..sassy but cute.
If you like funny stories, stop reading here.
From here until the end of this post…This is where it gets serious. Please know that I’m fine, baby’s fine but I had a very sobering moment that I can’t shake.
After the tech was done with her ‘checklist’ finding all the things she needed to find, she was about to leave the room and told me the doc would in soon to go over our scan in detail. I asked her if everything was ok, legally she couldn’t say as her job was to ‘find’ the doc’s job is to ‘analyze’ and ‘tell’. But she gave me the reassurance she was allowed that everything seemed perfectly fine.
So we waited.
We waited for the doctor to go over our ultra sound for nearly a solid hour. At one point I went to the nurses station to make sure they knew I was there and had not forgot about me!
When the doc came in, he said in a nutshell ‘congrats….baby looks happy, healthy and developing normally’. That was a HUGE sigh of relief. I joked about his tardiness saying I thought he forgot about us! He apologized and a serious look came over his face. He said he needed to spend more time with another patient going over their ultrasound.
Of course he couldn’t tell us details, I didn’t need any. I knew. A 20 week ultra sound, is meant to not only see the cute little blurry face of our little girl, but medically speaking their making sure everything is developing normally, looking for spinal cord abnormalities, brain defects, heart defects and so on.
Without saying the words, I knew in that hour my husband and I spent in that tiny exam room, waiting, joking, trying to decide on names and what to eat for dinner…in the next room or down the hall there was another set of parents who was probably not as happy an as us. They were receiving information that would take them on emotional roller coaster. They were getting news that may only change their lives for a few hours with an unplanned surgery or change the course of their entire lives.
I’ve been living with these thoughts for the past 4 weeks. I’ve been thinking everyday how lucky I am so have a perfect baby girl with me. I’ve been thinking of those parents that I will probably never meet and the challenges they might be facing.
Every child is perfect and wonderful in their own way and parents will always worry about their child, everyday.
But to you, the parent who just learned of your child’s diagnosis…good, bad or indifferent…I see you. And I’m thinking of you. Always.